Former paramedic Kylie Edwards had never written before she enrolled in the Australian Writers’ Centre’s Personal Storytelling for Veterans and First Responders course. By the end of it, she believed she could write a memoir.
“This has changed my life and given me back my voice!” she says. “The course has shown me that I do have stories and I matter.”
For Kylie, who left the ambulance service living with PTSD, the course offered something she hadn’t found anywhere else. “As a First Responder with PTSD, the fact that we were allowed and encouraged to attend was a huge drawcard,” she says.
Kylie is frank about how isolating life can be after leaving service. “Paramedics with PTSD who have left service do not have any spaces to attend, support or heal and we fund our own therapy etc. because no one will help people like me – we are overlooked and ignored,” she says.
“I really needed something like this to help me to find my voice and dig myself out of the blackness that is PTSD. For the RSL to include me in this course was like winning the lottery.”
Nervous at first
She admits she arrived with doubts, both about how she would be received and about whether she could write at all. “I didn’t think that the Veterans would be as accepting of a broken Paramedic so I was a little worried in each Zoom session,” she says. “I have never written and thought I would not be good enough.”
The structure of the course helped. “I loved the format,” she says. “PTSD has turned my brain to mush, especially when crippling anxiety enters the space and I loved the simple examples and explanations.”
Sharing her writing with the group was daunting, but it turned out to be one of the most valuable parts of the experience. “I loved the writing exercises and although it was anxiety-inducing at first, sharing the writing was actually helpful.”
The personal feedback from her writing mentor made a real difference too. “Her feedback was encouraging (even when my writing was garbage) and for the first time I began to believe that I could write a memoir.”
“Your story matters”
Kylie’s turning point came from hearing two simple messages again and again throughout the course: “You have a story” and “Your story matters.”
After years of feeling she didn’t belong, those words meant a great deal. “Being a broken Ambo and tossed aside by the Ambulance Service when I retired meant that I have struggled with my self-esteem and felt that I didn’t belong in any space,” she says.
“The course has opened my eyes and heart, allowing the light to shine for the first time in decades. I will continue to write and tell my story, slowly but steadily.”
Kylie’s advice to others
Kylie’s advice to anyone thinking about writing is simple. “I would tell them to choose a course and jump in, that the centre is a wonderful place to start the writing journey.”
And she has a message for the people who ran the course. “You will never know the difference that you made to me by offering the course and including me in it. I can’t thank you enough.”
Personal Storytelling for Veterans and First Responders is open to individuals, and organisations can also enrol a group of veterans or first responders to do the course together.
Courses taken at AWC:
